What in the world is going on?! That has been the question I have been asking myself most of the day today. Nothing bad or unexpected (in any other part of the world) made me ask this question. Yet, I feel as if I was living in the Twilight Zone for a good portion of the afternoon...
This morning, for the first time since Bernie and Cheryl dropped me off in Kobe, I met a few fellow gaijin missionaries for a Bible study in nearby Suma Ward. I have spoken with a lot of friends and family through Skype, and I have been to visit Tokyo, so I have not felt particularly disconnected from people, but it was good to meet other missionaries who are in similar places in life. They have been in Japan longer than me and have great insight into the culture, not to mention their great personalities. The Bible study time was mostly introductions and chatting about our various experiences in Japan, but it was an energizing time being around similar people here in Japan.
Following the Bible/fellowship time, a member of the church where we met for fellowship brought all the makings for yakisoba (quickly taking the lead in my "favorite dishes of Japan" list) and we cooked up a fine lunch. What better way to have a chance to get to know people than over a freshly cooked meal (that for the most part did not include seafood--whoo! Still working on that particular cultural difference). After lunch the two other missionaries had to head out for meetings/classes... and this is where the day took an unexpected turn...
As I was putting on my backpack to leave, the Japanese member of the church who brought the food for lunch suddenly asked about my plans for the afternoon. She had apparently called a Japanese couple who are friends of hers and asked if they would hang out with me for the afternoon. Before I know it, a car pulls up and I'm riding to a random guy's house to talk and have some social time for the afternoon. After a hike up a local small mountain, some tea and coffee, some English conversation, and a short excursion to see the neighborhood (a beautiful tree-lined neighborhood with a couple schools and children playing on the rec. fields and walking home from classes), I was given a ride all the way back to my apartment... No paying for a train. That was unacceptable. I was going to ride in style.
This is not the Japan I expected. I have mentioned to many people that I feel blessed by the relationships I am already building here, but really, I continually expect the Japanese people to be polite but distant. Not so by my present experience. Between the Tarumi Church of God and the people from other churches, I am assured that I will never be alone in Japan. While this is good, I feel like I'm not able to adequately process the chasm of my presuppositions about Japan and my experiences thus far. I am kind of waiting for the other shoe to drop... to be pushed out of the relationships I've just begun. I feel like I should start having this kind of conversation:
"Ummm... I'm really happy you want me to go to _______, but aren't you supposed to be culturally distant? I've read how Japan is kind of a cold culture, slow to form relationships. I mean, sure, you get the reward for one of the most polite nations on the planet, but are you sure you want to take me to ________? I don't want to impose on your distant-from-people life that I have assumed is true of all Japanese people because I read about the culture before I came."
How weird that some of my culture shock is coming from a negative presupposition that is being proven wrong! (It's maybe as strange as the realization that Japan is a nation free from the trappings of clothes dryers--definitely a toss-up on which is more extreme and has a greater impact on my life).
Maybe this means nothing to you, but today was a baffling (yet still positive) experience. Perhaps as I learn more of the language and culture I will be able to look back and identify the distance placed between me and the Japanese people, distance that I am just ignorant to right now (notice me clinging to the presupposition here...). In the meantime, I suppose I will just be happy that I got to hike up a small mountain and see Kobe with a man who has lived in Kobe his entire life but has also traveled around the world. I will be happy that I had the opportunity to have tea and coffee and unexpected English fellowship. I will be joyful for the relationships that bring familiarity to an otherwise very unfamiliar place.
Peace and more coming either Friday or Saturday...
P.S. I have GOT to start taking my camera everywhere with me! It seems like every time I turn a corner, someone is randomly inviting me to go somewhere new to sightsee. Just when I feel like I'm getting into a routine and understanding life, I start getting spontaneous invitations to check out the local world of Japan minus the device that provides proof of the experience to the rest of the world.
1 comment:
lol This seriously cracks me up. This has happened to me at least once every two or three weeks for 10 months now. And yes!, take your camera everywhere; whenever I don't have it, someone ends up asking me to do something or an amazing amount of people end up coming to the English Cafe we had (e.g. this last Saturday).
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